I took the kids to a carnival tonight.  By myself.  I really didn't want to, but I told the kids if they behaved today that we would go and they did so I kept my word and we went.  BACA (Bikers Against Child Abuse) was there and they were giving the kids tattoos.  My kids go crazy for tattoos, so we waited in line for a BACA tattoo.  While we were waiting, we talked about S and how these men rode motorcycles too.  When we got to the tattoo guy, V put his hand out and told him that his daddy rode a motorcycle.  The man said "so do I!  I fall off sometimes, does your daddy fall off sometimes too?"  V just told him no.  It really made me think about how we have no idea what is going on in other people's lives.  None!

The kids did pretty well at the carnival though, especially since it was so late for them.  I'd like to thank S for that.  I feel like he is around and he helps me when I need it most.

Today, M peed on the potty at my parents house and we were all clapping and cheering for her when her battery powered toothbrush (that is broken and hasn't worked in weeks and was sitting on the counter next to me completely untouched) turned on.  It was like S was saying, "I'm here and I'm proud of you, M!"

I like when things like that happen.  Maybe I'm crazy and it just happens, but it gives me a peace to think it's him.  I used to only feel him at home, but now I hardly feel him here at all.  I talk to him often and I think he tells me what he thinks I should do in his own ways, but I still want to feel him here.  I miss him.  I will always miss him.